‘Concerning Quality, Again’: J.H. Prynne’s Christmas Cracker Jokes
Posted by John Clegg
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What do you get if you eat the Christmas decorations?
Such persons are hungry; the rival / ventures his life in deep water, the reddish gold / glints in the shadows of our lustful solitude.
Who is Santa’s favourite singer?
The open question over and under and wasted / as childish carols, ripe well before time.
How does Good King Wenceslas like his pizzas?
Under constant erasure, cutting out the bottom dish.
Why did Santa apologise to Rudolph?
Remorse is a pathology of / syntax…
When is a boat like snow?
As or like / sure, arrow too near in wet shoes.
What did the policeman say to Santa?
Arrest / is sprung up, hope holds it, wish / wears its diadem
How did Luke Skywalker know what he was getting for Christmas?
The cruel child is elevated this morning / by the prospect of careful memories. How he / turns warmly into the shade, how he would / like to lay open his left arm.
Knock Knock
Who’s there
Kaz
Kaz who?
Kazoo Dreamboats or, On What There Is (Cambridge: Critical Documents, 2011)
[All quotes from Poems (Bloodaxe, 2015): p.70, p.255, p.426, p.233, p.666, p.204, p.182.]